Prena Poetry

I have watched the strongest people crumble down into fragments; I have also watched love heal each one of them. They always told me they missed parts of their lives because it either resided a thousand miles away or just a phone call away. They told me they missed the smell of lighted incense sticks on Sunday morning or the post breakfast conversations. They told me they also missed the dirty foot marks their best friends left on the bed. Because they belonged there, didn’t matter if they were a billion light years apart, for them home was a home and love was always love, and together it was just powerful enough to transcend any time or space. And I sit here, with my leg on top of another, staring at the multiple dots in air, trying to connect them, with a hope that maybe one day I can also sympathize and feel the crushing weight in my stomach. I’m a good human, I tell to myself but maybe not good enough to make the world understand that I’m also grinding in the ache. How can I ever make them understand what it is like to place my hand on my chest and realize this is no longer the heartbeat I used to own. And maybe I don’t sympathize well or miss parts and pieces of my life, because I never belonged to anywhere or to anyone. And the only time where it felt like home was when I put my arms around myself and fell apart in the narrow bathroom space. I will go to sleep tonight and wake up the other day, the world will keep on moving but I guess I will never know if I am strong or just too vulnerable.