Prena Poetry

when you start taking happiness
in pills of whites and yellows and blues
you will see yourself rising out of the water
washing the sand out of your hair
and picking up your month old clothes
you will find yourself standing up
only to realize that is not your feet.
you take a breath
like your mother tells you to do
but it doesn’t feel like your lungs
you only feel like a clump of flesh
wearing a garland

the grass is always greener on the other side
and everyone tells you
to stand on those grasses
but you know they are just thorns
that pricks you but cannot make you bleed
because you have been so used to
drowning,
and filling up your chest
with water and waves
that now you no longer know
how it even feels to be alive